“She stood in the storm and when the wind did not blow her way she adjusted her sails” – Elizabeth
In light of the topic or actually the question asked, I sat at my desk and asked myself,
“What motivates you?”
Yes, anyone who knows me, would know that I am married and have a handsome little baby boy who consumes my life with so much joy and brings a sense of love to my heart that only a mother would understand, but that dear readers is not my motivation – shocking- I know!
Over a year ago I was asked a similar question and when I answered that my soon to be baby boy was what I lived for, I was asked something so thought provoking – something no mother would ever want to be asked-but it enlightened me:
“What happens when your baby isn’t there anymore? How do you live then?”
That was the day I realised that no matter how much you love the people or things around you, they should not be your reason for being.
As selfish as this may sound – and before you judge me – let me explain. Life itself is a struggle on its own and when your existence is dependent on someone or something else your livelihood is easily lost. This dependence is not only referring to death, it could be an emotional loss too, whether it be because of a break up or merely losing my sense of purpose within someone else or their lives. I still am the dependant and am leaving myself vulnerable to so much that could go wrong. Now, I’ve been through so much in such a short space of time and when broken down into so many little pieces of myself I realised that the reason I felt like “nothing” was because my happiness was based on something entirely out of my control.
I’ve struggled with this for a long time and have only come to realise recently that I am my own motivation! Yes me! Since then, I’ve been getting up every morning (after fighting my alarm for extra time), thanking the Almighty for waking me. Once that’s done since things are only as bad as I believe they are, I start filling my morning with positivity, by constantly telling myself that today WILL be a good day and for the duration of the day it becomes my mantra and when that stops working – chocolate helps for those moments when I’ve forgotten what a mantra is.
By constantly using that affirmation to create the life I want, I’ve reached a point where I am truly content. I found myself complaining and moaning less about what I haven’t achieved in my day and being grateful for what I have. Things could be much worse or at least that’s what I always say! So, stay positive and remember that,
“Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise again” – Victor Hugo
I am strong and powerful in many ways and when I am happy, no matter how bad things are – my world is always at peace.
Thank you for reading,